shawnandcathy

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Since 11/21/99...Thankyou for visiti

When I first thought about making a personal homepage for Cathy and myself I wondered what was the point. I didn't have the time. I didn't know what to say. Well, I still don't have the time and I still don't know what to say. But I have begun to think that there is a point. The point is the story. We have been very lucky and at the same time very ordinary. And that is perhaps just why the story is important, and why it should be told. I have not been very good at telling stories. The problem is compounded by the often hidden nature of our lives. Without the story, our lives drift. The telling of the story reminds us who we are and who we can become. It makes known both what is possible and what might be possible. It marks a path that is at once magical and ordinary: a path that takes many different directions but always leads to hope in the future. So I am going to try and tell our version of the story. Maybe no one will see this page. But telling of the story is still imporant. We need the stories, especially the young among us. If we do not tell our stories, others will tell stories about us. And the result of that is a loss of power. The power to shape our futures. So here is our story. The story of Shawn and Cathy. First off let me introduce ourselves. My name is Shawn and I am 29 years old. I was born in Cherry Hill, New Jersey and I now live in Port Richey, Florida. My soon to be wife is Cathy and she is 35 years old and was born in New York. She too now lives in Port Richey, Florida. You can see pictures of us and our children in our online photo album located in the links page to the left. I've put a link to it so everyone can see who we are. When you visit our album PLEASE sign our guestbook so we know that you dropped by. Cathy and I met back in May 1999 while we both worked at our local Wal-mart. Cathy was a manager and me...well, I was just another employee with a name tag. We both had feelings for each other but never made it known to each other for the simple reason of Wal-marts policy. "MANAGERS AND EMPLOYEES ARE NOT ALLOWED TO DATE". Well, two months went by and to make a real long story short we were engaged on July 22, 1999 to be married on December 31, 1999. Needless to say we don't work for Wal-mart anymore. We immediately went out and got our own place together so we could start our lives together. Setting up a household with someone is one thing. Creating a life that will last is another. We both instinctively knew that we would need a support system if we were going to make it. After all, look at the support systems straight couples have. And even they seem to have a tough time making a go of it. The first couple months was pretty scary. We both were unemployed for a while and it was more difficult than I had anticipated. And of course, we needed to adjust to daily living. That was the easy part. This is being written from my viewpoint but I can't imagine anyone easier to live with than Cathy. She might tell you otherwise about me! We have tried a lot of things the past four months to make not only a home but a life. So far we are doing a great job at it. When we're not working we are working around the house when I'm not engaged in other projects. We rented our present home in Port Richey, Florida three months ago with the help of my Dad. The house needed some work but we tried to do what we could ourselves, learning along the way. But we also learned when to give up and call in the professionals that is if Dad couldn't fix it. Anyway, there is never a lack of something to do around here. I inherited the vice of tinkering from my Dad and it has served me well in my life. I always seem to have a project of some kind going, working on a new experiment or some piece of electronic equipment that exists on my mind. The ability to create in this area make me different from other people but the knack comes in handy at home when something is on the fritz. And of course if all else fails...call Dad who only lives a couple of miles down the road from us. Thank God for that! We do have a small dog, "Oscar Mayer" the dog and two cats "Bakira" and "Trouble", which Trouble is a relatively recent addition to our household. You can also see them in our online photo album located in the link page to the left. Our social life is more limited than we would like. We don't go to the movies. In fact we haven't been to a movie since we've been together. At times it's just fatigue, but mainly not much appeals to us not at the going rate of admission, anyway. We are both not into the bar scene so you won't find us there either. Consciously or unconsciously we set ourselves somewhat apart from the prevailing visible "gay culture". We are trying to make a life together and don't think it is healthy to continue to live as if we were single people, going to bars and clubs a lot. I think we have both seen to many wrecked relationships that way. Anyway, the VERY loud music and heavy smoke don't appeal to us. In a way, all we want is to be "just folks". I guess we pretty much got our wish. So far everyone has been wonderful. We are simply accepted "as is". No details are required. I suppose it is natural for some people to wonder what has enabled us to make it this far. What seret "formula" have we followed so that we have succeeded this far where others have failed? Sometimes we wonder, too. All we can say is that we really want to be together. We want it enough to do what ever it might take. People are amused at how we finish each others sentences sometimes. We laugh when we both have the same unspoken thought at the same time. We find ourselves blurting out the same comment in reaction to something. Some people always marveled at how many things we do together. It just seems natural to us. That's why we chose to be married. We like being together. We also--I in particular--need our space. We may work at opposite sides of the house in the evening or on our days off, but when Cathy has to be away for any reason, I walk through the house looking for something, expecting to find her surfing the channels, feeling her absence, impatient for her return. Just to be here, with and for each other has become a comfort and a joy we could not have imagined when we took those first tentative steps. And there is still so much more to know, so much more to learn about each other and so many more discoveries to make and adventures to share. So we have no magic "formula" and doubt that there is one. We do know that any relationship, whether it is legally sanctioned marriage or a match seemingly made in heaven, is never finished product. We become a little less or a little more "married" each and every day based on the decisions we make and the actions we take. Progress is not always steady because we are not perfect. But there is a joy in the journey. We will be beginning our "married life" on December 31, 1999. We only hope that the rest of our lives will bring us more joy and enough challenge to keep us sharp and together. We welcome your e-mail at MichaelJayLetts@netscape.net. We welcome your stories and comments and we welcome new friends. We wish for you what we wish for ourselves. Please feel free to e-mail us any time and we will respond in a timely manner. If you have made it this far with our story we hope you have enjoyed it and please bookmark our online photo album. New pictures will be added until the beginning of the year 2000 and it will include our wedding photos after December 31, 1999. Please make sure to refresh the page each time you visit to provide you with each and every update.